I grew up there. Look into Edmond. It's on the north side of town and has the best school district in the city. And as long as you're relatively close to I-35 the commute to Tinker can be kept somewhat reasonable. The town is clean, well kept, and low crime because it's where most of the upper middle class of the city are. The problem is Tinker is in Midwest City, their school district is crap. And the closest other school districts are OKC (very bad) and Del city, also crap. Moore school district isn't too bad, but nowhere close to Edmonds. Norman school district is pretty good too, but it's on the far south side of the city. So as long as your husband doesn't mind a 45 min drive to work (depending on how far you are from the highway of course) then Edmond is where you should go.
If you have an specific questions about the area, pm me.