Welcome everyone, take a seat, we'll begin the week 5 Safety briefing shortly. With us here today is Ghost SWO, Commander of U.S. Strategic Meme Command, he'll be kicking off the briefing for us today.
Ghost SWO: "Welcome to week 5, applicants. I can personally guarantee results will be disseminated before New Years. Until then, memes will continue until morale improves. We're not happy, until you're not happy. That is all."
Sparse applause
Thank you Ghost SWO, inspiring as always.
On another note, the Safety officer would like to inform everyone; Please stop using the dormitory hallways as your personal slip and slide, the soap supplies are running low and we've already replaced the wall trim three times. The crayons in the break room are not for consumption. Do not listen to the Marines when they ask you you for more. The, "Do not feed the Marines" sign behind the foosball table is there for a reason. They are simple creatures and are prone to unearthly habits. Whoever keeps updating the official Excel sheet in crayon instead of black ballpoint pen, Mntman would like to see you personally after the briefing.
This concludes your weekly Safety briefing, have a lovely week 5 everyone.