As long as we're telling stories.....
So I eat a HUGE breakfast prior to an 11 hour mission. Well, hour 5 rolls around and I realize I'm not gonna make it. So I line the ol' non flushable P-3 toilet with our typical CRYSTAL CLEAR trash bags (triple bag thank you). I do my thing, clean up, tie 'er off, spray some Lysol, good to go. Throw that bad boy in the Doppler Well (cavity in the belly accessible from the cabin, but not heated, so the 'matter' would be supercooled if not frozen).
So, in typical P-3 fashion,we land, I take my sh*t with me, so my enlisted guys won't have to deal with it.
As I pull it out of the Doppler Well, my AW2 acoustic operator looks at me all excited.
(Dead Serious): "Kick Ass! The Lieutanant made Doppler Ice Cream!!! Sir! Sir! What flavor??? Can I have some???"
I look at him, say "Rocky Road Champ, it's all yours..."
(No I didn't let him take it or open it, but boy i wanted to)