Don't panic, nothing is fucked, dude. First, understand there's a process in Pensacola for this. Your background, tickets, karma, or just desserts have nothing to do with it...if they need pilots then they're willing to flex a bit. If they don't, then even if you really want it and are otherwise qualified and everyone wants you to have it, they're not going to redes you because they have to have a slot in which to put you.
Second, there will be other opportunities for you to switch over to the pilot side. Yes, there's the "first in your class" thing, but there's a reason that happens so rarely. You'll be in a class with a bunch of other very smart, very motivated, hard-working kids who all want to do well.
So, if you can get over the flight physical hump, give re-des'ing a shot. If it doesn't work out there, then go be the best FO you can and keep in your back pocket the idea of getting an anchorectomy at the end of your first Fleet tour. It's not routine, but it's not uncommon. Again, re-des'ing is a way for the Navy to manage its manning numbers - they may need pilots in your YG by then. Especially given the avalanche of airline hiring everyone but BuPers sees coming in the next few years.
And NB for your own info - when I was an instructor there, ERAU kids did not have a good reputation, not least because often they seemed to feel studying basic flight and systems stuff was beneath them. Saw lots of them (and USNA kids) at PRBs. Don't be that "Riddle Kid". Your job is not to show them how much you know, it's to show that you can learn what they want you to know - because flight-side, no one will give a shit how you did it when you flew privately.
Third, given your background, you've had no exposure to NFOs or what they do. At least go be around some and talk to them before you scrabble desperately to get out of it. It's all flying and it's all good. NFOs aren't glorified helper monkeys or (no offense to NACs) just "officer aircrewmen," as I heard a helo guy describe them. I knew guys in flight school who were in similar spots to you - NAMI-whammied and "I'm going to re-des after my Fleet tour because I've got private time and I want to be a pilot". Years later I bumped into them in the Fleet and they're still sporting two anchors and perfectly happy.