The ONLY thing that I'll corroborate in the OP, is that personal issues (oh, my wife is going to school in SD, so I need to go there) DO come up for fleet selections/RAG selections out of advanced. I personally saw many folks get SD/Norfolk over other people who seemingly did a bit better because they had a Wife/fiancee/cousin/dog in socal/VA and needed to be there. I can understand a "child with special needs" who needs certain care at a certain location, but even still... I think if a person does well, and wants a location, they should get first dibs over someone else who didn't do as well and not because their wife is currently living somewhere. You may say "needs of the Navy. You knew when you signed up that you can't always get what you want", and to that I say, sure. I know. That's why I never bitched to the commodore or skipper or whoever would listen about how it's "unfair", and plus I was happy with my selection
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But I would also say that the married folks shouldn't get an unfair advantage to be stationed with their wives/family simply because they HAVE one. Same deal. They knew when they signed up the needs of the Navy dictate where they go. So if they get stationed away from family, then they have to deal. It's almost like the Navy is trying to give us incentive and push us into certain lifestyles.... marriage good (BAH, station accomodations etc), alcohol bad (endless briefs about alcohol, "alcohol related incidents" = ticket for jaywalking while LOOKING at an alcohol ad)
As for selection for primary locations or advanced locations? Yeah... buy a house where you want to go... you'll likely be renting it out. That has absolutely NO bearing on future selection.
/sarcasm end
EDIT: Looking at your profile, you're an advanced Helo guy, so your post may have been asking about EXACTLY what I stated above, so in that case... you are probably right and saw a few things I saw around selection time.