MARINES CANCEL OSPREY
quote:USMC Cancels Osprey, Returns Old Helicopters to Service
01 April 2001
Aero-News.net
by Columnist-at-Large Kevin O'Brien
The USMC today announced that it was finally giving up on the beleaguered V-22 Osprey convertiplane. "I have every confidence in the aircraft," Commandant of the Marine Corps Gen. James L. Jones told the Pentagon press, "but it's wasting too much of my time. Last week I spent thirty hours talking to Congressional staffers, ten hours in a screaming match with the press (I won; no surprise), six hours meeting with widows and orphans, and four hours trying to talk a Bell-Boeing marketing manager out of jumping off the Pentagon roof. I didn't join the Marines to talk to a bunch of jerks. I could go down the hall to [Army Chief of Staff Gen.] Shinseki for that."
The Marines will now fly the Vietnam-era CH-46 and H-1 helicopters "until the cows come home," Jones said in exasperation. To make up shortfalls, especially in spare parts, the Marines have sworn to repossess any equivalents of these Marine helicopters, wherever they may be.
As it turns out, most of them are in scrapyards or museums. A National Air and Space Museum curator was injured in a scuffle with USMC Repo men. "All I have left is dangling cables and memories, and I've lost my pride and joy to some Jarheads," he told us.
"I could have told him," Jones said. "Don't mess with the Marines." Won't the museum aircraft be unairworthy, we asked? "We've also ordered lots of baling wire and chewing gum. Everyone knows a Marine crew chief can fix anything with those two crucial supplies. Under the last administration, crew chiefs were reduced to buying their own chewing gum and baling wire. Things have looked up considerably under the new administration and we are hoping the Corps can close the chewing gum gap by 2002," Jones said.
What will happen to the handful of Marine aviators who have been given the now-discontinued Powered Lift rating? "I'm not sure," Jones admitted. "There's been some talk of redesigning the Osprey so it uses more baling wire and chewing gum."
FMI: http://www.usmc.mil