What you describe is not the universal experience. There's been a significant push across the force to make members travel onsite to their cross assigned (CAI) units regularly under penalty of your paper balancing out the RSCA since now the UMUICs hold the pen on FITREPs.I just, *sigh*. To anyone reading this considering SELRES, you should really do your homework on your unit. It's not like Active Duty. You get to pick. You can pick a unit halfway across the country and drill at an NRC closer to your house. There's contact information for every billet in JOAPPLY. Call them. Ask what their expectations are. Some are hard over on 0700-1500 drill days. Some are flexible for khaki. Some let you telework. I've seen my CO in person once in 3 years.
Demanding you work outside of drill weekends for free is quite extreme and should be frowned upon if you have good unit leadership. If that expectation exists for some real reason, paid RMP and ADTs exist for this reason, or at a minimum an unpaid drill. I'm a unit OIC and my asks of my khaki outside DWE are maybe 2-3 small things a month that take 5 minutes. Like mustering a sailor, approving a reschedule, NROWS approving, DTS, whatever. I'd say I do ~4hrs of navy work a month and I use RMPs when able (not many in the funding world we live in) and unpaids otherwise. Mostly DWE prep and the standard admin tasks.
It also doesn't matter how good a unit's leadership is if the NRC is the tyrant causing all the pain and threatening admin Us for not getting their taskers done outside of the DWEs.